@Sakurapuss, I'm sorry your teens do this too! It sucks! One of my teens is just aloof and uses me. But the other attacks me like yours. He's always telling me I'm doing stuff wrong, always telling me what to do, scoffing, rolling his eyes. He even gaslights me - I'll say something to him about the way he bullies his little brother and he'll give me this look which very clearly states "what the hell are you on about, Crazy Woman?" with all the disbelief and disrespect going with it. I'm with you on the "why so much hate in return" thing, it really hurts. Recently, my son broke his thumb. It was me took him to the hospital, then drove him 2 hours to another hospital and sat by his bedside for 2 days til they could operate to pin it. It's me driving him 2 hours back to the hospital today for his checkup. As soon as it happened, I texted his father to let him know. This father happens to live across the road from the local hospital, so took the son to see him before driving to the other hospital. There was Dad with a beer, all he could offer was, "good luck son". And yet I"M the one treated like crap, snapped at, yelled at, called stupid every day. Yeah, that hurts!
I have self-worth, I know my value, what I can do, what I'm skilled at, and the fact that so much of what I do is deemed "men" stuff (I was an electrician, building cars since I was 12, do all my own mechanics, building and repairs etc) is something I'm proud of - the fact that I can be independent, you know? - But it really sucks that in order to maintain my self-worth I have to struggle against negatives and nastiness from a young man I love so much.
