Worry Room - Get it out, and walk away

[utopia]

Group hugs are good. @Shaz51.
I'm trying to avoid a panic attack at the moment. I'm barely keeping it at bay.

[Faith-and-Hope]

❤️💕 @utopia .... hugs from me too ...

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Former-Member

I hope today was a better day for you ....

❤️💕

[utopia]

I'm missing my old friend today.
Strange how you can miss someone when you don't really know them.
Strange how someone you don't really know - can feel like you really do.
Strange how easily someone can become such a big part of my life.
Strange how intense my feelings are.
Strange how strange this all feels.
Frustrated because there is nothing I can do.

[Shaz51]

Hello @Lucy999

how are you today ??

[BlueBay]

I am angry at my mum for not believing me not helping or loving me

i am really angry at the abusers who took away my innocence i hate them so much

i am missing my dad so much, i wish i could just see him and not my mum

i hate my brother

i want to be alone, somewhere far away

i want to leave

I want to scream, kick, punch, yell, hit something, someone

i want to SH

i am crying,

i am scared

i am being punished for something i did not do

i am just not enough

i try to be a good person

i have had enough

I am tired of this crap

End of rant for now .........

[BlueBay]

i wanted a mum who loved me for who i am abused or not abused

i wanted a mum who loved me with depression or not, with BPD, with anxiety

I just wnated a mum

but no i got a person who i don't even know who she is anymore; she is narcissitic, controlling person, she ruled my life for the past 45 years.  she betrayed me, she took my childhood life, my childhood photos, i have nothing, nothing of my childhood.  do i exist?

i miss my dad but am angry at him too.  why can't he just ring me; just to say i am sorry for what you have goine through; why cna't he just ring and tell me 'i love you' or visit me and give me a hug.

i have nothing of my childhood.  i am angry.

i feel like that i am a nobody.  i am no one.  i am so hurt by what she told me - 'you have betrayed the familyu' - how dare you say that to me; i have done nothing wrong and yet i am to blame. why ? because you don't want to hear the truth, well the truth is that your son sexually abused me, yes that's right your only son, you know the one you always think is the best child, the one who does nothing wrong.  well i could write a book about what he has done in his life and it hasn't been great.  yet you told me 'i have betrayed the family'.

i am disgusted in you, i am hating every minute i am writing this.  i am furious, emotional, crying;

how can a mother treat their daughter like this.  you have never been close to me or my kids, why.  when i was born 10 weeks prem i shouldn't have survived. why did I?  you didn't even spend time with me in the hospital?

i am going to stop now, my life is overr with you.  see how it feels to have no one.  i have been hurt like a sharp item going through my heart.  what you told me that day and how you treated me i will never forget.

i can go on and on but right now i am so angry i can't even see what i am writing because of my tears. i hate you mum you have betrayed me.

OMG i need to stop 😞

[light321]

I just feel like crap!!!!!! because i got so much to write and i just can't just so angry.

[Former-Member]

im never going to be ok. 

[Kurra]

That's what I used to think @Former-Member but I was wrong. Recovery is possible.
Hugzzz 💕 🎶