Just checking in.

[Former-Member]

oh dear on the bruises and scrapes @Teej, no good! behave Teej's Dog!  My dog has a tendency to paw me when he wants something and he has scratchy strong nails too... 

im not sure yet, will depend on how they come home and the weather. son has been finding the world difficult lately and the wheels have been falling off for him at home a lot after bad days. not really sure how to manage things sometimes and he has some appointments late next week to hopefully get some extra funding for OT (but they dont have any magic wands either...) they have an extended visit these holidays so i dont get them home for a while still either and with appointmnts there wont be much time, They struggled with going which was hard. more head in the sand kind of stuff. not knowing and silence is hard. 

[Teej]

Oh that sounds hard @Former-Member. I hope they can find some funding and support. 

Oh im sorry about the extended visit. It must be terribly hard with them gone and the weather not giving you a break either. 

Maybe just having appointments will give you some time while you’re out to do some impromptu things with them. I hope they come home and give you a lovely honeymoon phase. I remember the first few days were great and then back into normal behaviour after coming home from seeing their dad. 🤞 that all is ok. 

[Former-Member]

theres generally no honeymoon phase with mine @Teej , but very clingy and needing lots of reassurance in between being angry with each other or nothing or everything. magic wands would be great! it'll be ok though.

[Appleblossom]

  Oh  @Teej

I have had to reclaim myself from my animals too.  I kind of indulged them in a way and never felt I could say "no" for me .... even with the bloomin cats!

Since I have had a mental health care team and been focussed on boundaries, I am settling a lot better within myself about all those tons of little things that happen every day in family/pet life.

We can be so hard on ourselves. Often we dont even see it until its a habit.

@Former-Member Thats right your hols are later than here.

I think most mums lose themselves in the heavy duty child rearing years.  You are doing a fabulous job, running the household, the classroom and just BEING there. Have you got anything planned for you while the children are away?

Keep hanging in there Bella.

[Teej]

Mine needed to be separated @Former-Member when they came home. As long as they had space away from each other things were ok. They just needed time out from each other after time away so I guess my honeymoon phase was them giving each other a wide birth for a few days. I wouldn’t see s3 for the first few days as he’d take off to find friends to catch up with (I guess this is when he was older than yours) s2 would hide in his room and read. The others just entertained themselves with their toys. It’s weird how they all react differently. 

Take the hugs while while you can. I know it sucks that this is so destructive to you all. It’s a sucky system really. You know when I find that magic wand you’ll get first use 💜🤗😘

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Appleblossom
I do have a few things planned for the next few days, now to do them lol!
... and i have plenty of work that i should be doing (as always). Hope you're going well.

[Teej]

Thanks @Appleblossom it’s nice to hear it’s not just me. I’m hoping respite might help sort some of those boundaries out. 

Cheers bella 💜🤗

[Appleblossom]

@Teej: 

About a year ago I decided that it was really silly to accept them sleeping on me and putting out my back. Dumb Dumb, but I had to value me to even think of setting a boundary. Once I had firmed it up, inside myself, it was easy to solve. You guyz I love you but you Cant sleep ON me. 

Yeah it was the dominance game ... but really.... eye roll emoticon needed.lol

@Former-Member We are good atm.  Yes do your plans, or at least 80% .. lol

Time for me to log off.

Good Night ladies.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Love and hugs @Teej @Former-Member @Appleblossom @CheerBear .....

[CheerBear]

Hi @Former-Member - thinking of you and thought I'd say hi here. From memory (which could be very wrong!) you are at the end of school holidays now? Wondering how you and yours are getting on. I hope you're all OK or OK enough.

Also a big wave and hi to @Maggie. Missing our cuppas lots ❤