Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea

Hi Greenpea, my son is back in hospital and just waiting to get him a bed. I have a few questions for you if that’s ok? I seem to remember that you have schizo affective disorder. My son was initially thought to have a depression type of schizo affective but now its becoming more apparent that the mood component is more likely to be bipolar. What type do you have? The so called specialists doubled and tripled his antidepressants and now because of the suicidal idealation side-affects he’s being weaned off that and a antipsychotic that’s affecting his liver function. What type of meds does your psychiatrist have you on? He will apparently be put on lithium the best mood stabilizer they have which apparently will improve his suicide risk. Do you have any thoughts or lessons which could make our journey a bit less rocky? I tried to negotiate that this process is handled as an outpatient but this apparently is impossible as last time my son was hospitalized his confidence greatly suffered and his studies/work as well as the negative impact of some of the other patients he met in the ward.

Thought you may have some thoughts and peace to offer. Really appreciate your previous thoughts and experience.

Take care and hope you and your are doing well.

On a positive note, my son finally got his drivers license and my daughter has a new boyfriend.

Best regards Dadcaringalone

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone Hi Dadcaringalone sorry to hear that your son is back in hospital that must be an awful blow not only to your son but to yourself ... Okay I was initially diagnosed with Bipolar1 because I would have massive mood swings where I would give away clothing, jewellry etc. spend up big on the meagre funds that I have. I also spent basically a year sleeping almost 24 hours a day I was just so tired ... very bipolar symmptoms. I also however have voices which were there all the time whilst I was being treated for bipolar so the diagnosis was then changed to schizoaffective disorder (mood swings and voices, paranoia etc) basically schizophrenia with a mood disorder attatched.

I am on a variety of pills, we are not allowed to mention the name of pills here but I can describe the too you. I am on a purple pill for moods, a white circular pill and a oval orange pill for my psychotic symptoms and a small white circular pill for my depression. All of which are working well for me. Not perfect as I do have breakthrough symptoms at times but most of the time (touch wood!) all is good. I am not on the pill that you mentioned.

I hope this helps ... I am so happy that your daughter and son have had some achievements lately though. Having a drivers licence will give your sone so much freedom and a sence of self worth and your daughter having a boyfiriend is just love I really hope it works out for them both and yourself of course.

Your friend greenpea 🙂

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea

Dearest Greenpea,

That all sounds pretty familiar to me but it was diagnosed the other way around for my son. Initially the psychotic voices were stronger than the bipolar symptoms and measured more risky by the medical establishment because he had pretty scary command hallucinations which he would act upon. This was the undiagnosed schizophrenia. The bipolar symptoms were initially incorrectly diagnosed of the depression type with very large dosages of antidepressants being prescribed with the side effects of increased suicidal idealations as a consequence because this is a unfortunate side affect of this class of medication.

Like your shopping sprees with jewelry and clothes, my son had huge shopping sprees which he described in quite funny terms but they are mostly Electronics at JB Hifi and I would say we have bought almost all items in the shop. He described these manic episodes as feeling invincible, staying up all night and feeling unbelievably happy for no particular reason. Don’t really want to describe the negative swing of the mood swings because its probably not allowed on this forum. Its particularly difficult for someone external to understand but these symptoms are highly risky and my son said to me it was as thou a dark uncomfortable cloud came down over everything.

I was really upset for him and his confidence that he had to return to hospital because he was just starting to get his head above water with his drivers license etc. It’s much better that my daughter is not here and she’s in a really good place at present and my parents, her grandparents, took her out for Saturday brunch last Saturday and the photo my mum send showed her with her old smile coming back. She had a similar negative response to antidepressants with the symptoms I described above and I personally feel they are being too easily prescribed by medicos because its the easy option to just take a pill and feel better. She managed it pretty bravely and she has now emerged from the dark cloud which was largely because she was looking up to her older brother role model with bipolar schizo affective disorder. It’s beautiful what she has described with her new boyfriend who seems to be really lovingly taking care of my daughter. They have had a few really romantic dates and he’s supporting her with the injections she needs to have for her leg sports injury to recover. There are so many beautiful things in the world and I’m off to see my son this afternoon in hospital after I have visited my carer support therapist who helping me adjust my life around my son. She’s been caring for her son with schizophrenia for 20 years. Pretty amazing lady. Take care my friend and keep trucking because there is so much beauty in the world.

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone Good morning Dadcaringalone can I say how much I love hearing from you. You are such a positive person who is dealing with so much and yet you never have a angry word to say about anything. Kudos to you Dadcaringalone :). Yes I was lucky my pdocs did not put me on high doses of antidepresents I am on a very meagre dose and it works well for me with the dose of the antipsychotic and mood disorder medication being higher both work well. 

I will tell you a funny story, one of the things I used to do when I was manic was give away or throw out stuff, in particular clothing and jewellry. For example  I had a string of pearls given to me by my god father, anyway one day I took them in a jewellry box to our local shopping centre saw an elderly lady and gave them to her and walked away lol .... I only have a pair of earrings and a watch on purpose now just incase I go manic again.

I hope your visit to your son goes well and he is improving and can come home soon.  Hope you have a sucessful time with your carer support therapist and am so happy for you that your daughter is doing so well how fantastic is that.

Love greenpea:)

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea

Thanks for your beautiful message greenpea. Like my messages, your messages make my day! Never hit-it-off so well with someone who had shared experience like you. I believe that this is what this forum is all about.

Love your giving away pearls story! Think it shows what a generous soul you are and in Buddhist terms it would show you are not connected to consumerism as all the so called valuable things we get attached to we can’t take with us when we die. Your manic state would be seen in many cultures as an advanced stage on the road to enlightenment! It’s important I believe to think about things in a different way. 

My son is also a very generous soul when he’s manic! He recently blew about 10 thousand dollars at JB Hifi, I got a new AppleWatch and iPhone 8 from his shopping.

I have to get cracking as I just got a call from the nurse in the Adult Mental Health facility. Speak later greenpea

Love to you and those you care for, stay strong.

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone Awww thank you Dadcaringalone 🙂 your words put a smile on my face. I love the way your son spent $10k and bought you a new apple watch and Iphone8 he obviously adores his dad and appreciates what you do for him so much. Funny there are many parts of my manic stage that I appreciate and enjoy unfortunately the downs are really low.... is like the waves on the sea up and down .... currents in the ocean pulling you this way and that. Never a dull moment.

Good luck with this afternoon.

greenpea

[Dadcaringalone]

@greenpea

Dear Greenpea,

sorry I have been out of contact. I been busy visiting my son every day in hospital and also fighting with my son’s university. Even though he registered with Disability Services, there is one stupid academic in their business school who is really discriminary towards students with mental health illnesses. My son usually gets an extra 2 weeks for all assignments over 20%. This one subject which has only made a change to his academic plan this week says no special consideration is possible and no extension for students in hospital.I blew my fuse yesterday about this as I believe it’s discrimination and my son has been trying his best to write the assignment because he can’t have access to his devices or laptop so needs to hand write everything to stop the withdrawing him from the subject. He has almost lost a year in credits this year because of hospitalization.

He was admitted because of the mispresribing of antidepressants causing suicidal idealations which I believe is also pretty disgusting from the hospital. Keeping up the pressure today and gotta run now to get off to the hospital for a family meeting. Don’t want my son to become institutionalized and was shocked to see all the patients walking around the ward obviously on pretty strong drugs to stabilize their moods. Take care and thanks for your ongoing support.

Love Dadcaringalone

PS My son’s chief Psychologist said he had one patient who bought a tesla car for quarter of a million dollars when manic！

[Lauz]

@Dadcaringalone that sounds like such a tough situation! It does seem extremely unfair that the teacher isn't helping you and your son in this. It is empowering to see how much you care and advocate for your son. 

I can also understand where you are coming from about the issues you have had with medications for your son. It is important however to be aware that for some, medication is very helpful and doses given and taken are very subjective to each individual. You are completely entitled to vent your feelings here - just need to be aware that we continue to encourage help seeking behaviour ☺️ Medication is one of those really tricky ones. It takes so much trial and error and time to find out what works for each and what doesn't. It can be tiring and stressful.

Your son is very lucky to have you in his life to help support him through this ⭐️ Great to see you are well supported in sharing your experiences here with members like @greenpea 👍🏼

[greenpea]

@Dadcaringalone Hi Dadcaringalone so sorry to hear about the lack of care and consideration re: university academic (but not surprised). Can you appeal? You shouldn't have to .... goes to show just because you have a lecturer doesn't mean you are smart  Fingers crossed you can get that sorted asap as you really don't need the extra stress right at this time. My ex worked at various universities if you like I could ask him what you should do regarding this lecturer. I will leave that with you but I am more than happy to.

Yes your don't want your son institutionalized.  I hope you are able to get him well and out of there again asap. Particularly since it was all due to him being over medicated with anti depressents by the hospital in the first place (everyone knows that is a no no I would have thought). 

ps: Is a good thing that I am poor otherwise I could have been tempted to buy an island 🙂

[Dadcaringalone]

@Lauz

Thank you for your kind supporting message. Yes its a difficult situation we face with my son and uni and also hospital. We are speaking with the Senior Disability manager this afternoon. After I sent a pretty strongly worded email, I started to get a bit more of a receptive response from the faculty concerned and now they are exploring whether my son’s knowledge of the learning can be assessed in another way. Let’s see what their response is, hopefully it will be positive and he doesn’t need to withdraw like before. I’m just trying to be there for my son and provide the most support I can so he can make and informed decision after his 2 pretty long hospitalizations, where the specialists are trying to get the right medication for his correct symptoms, so he doesn’t completely give up feeling he’s loosing the whole year of his studies which will greatly impact on his confidence.

Its interesting that because my son’s mental health illness has a mood component and when he has severe or acute symptoms that often those around him who love him the most get affected. I have been told to bring him straight back to hospital for his leave periods if his moods dramatically change towards the more risky direction. Members such as @greenpea have been particularly supportive and she’s a real darling. I often find myself borderline venting here because I find you get quite close to  members with very similar shared experience. 

My current thoughts about medication which you rightly say is one of those tricky ones! My son couldn’t unfortunately cope with some of this medication even though my wife wants to explore more holistic natural cures in Asia, I have seen him psychotic without them when it was undiagnosed schzo affective and it was scary and that was when our family had our first and hopefully last run in with the Police. We are trying to get it down to the bear minimum with less side effects as possible. My daughter is managing her depression without medication with regular therapy on a GP supervised mental health plan and I saw her spiral out of control when she was trying antidepressants. My feeling is they are too easily prescribed by GPs and should only be monitored by specialist psychiatrists. My son is finially finishing being weaned off them today on to medication which treats his biopolar symptoms more directly and also help mitigate his suicidal idealations.

By the way, love the Totoro on your profile, it reminds me of my daughter who has a range of different sized Totoro’s on her bed and a Totoro powerbank for her iPhone.

Thanks again for your ongoing support. This forum with mensline and my carer therapist has helped me get through some of the really dark clouds we have been through recently. We are now moving towards the silver lining which every cloud has and I anticipate that things will improve in the near future. I’m trying my very best to live mindfully in the present moment and next week I’m off to an international conference where I am presenting my experiences learning from old 88 year old enlightened monk. 

I wish you a sunny day wherever you are.