My Story and where to from here.. (very personal)

[MDT]

okay @SleepyPanda

[MDT]

I see @eudemonism

How can I do that though I wonder?

That sure sounds tough btw, about the intimate encounter. I think that's maybe what I am actually afraid of perhaps? which is why i need alcohol to get rid of the inhibition. If only I could rid that inhibition without alcohol...

It's a really weighty issue and I have no idea how to navigate it

[Zoe7]

Goodmorning @MDT just following along here buddy

Hiya @SleepyPanda hope you are doing ok 

[MDT]

All good @Zoe7
Funnily enough i think my new book might provide some answers but idk. Its a shitty thing this feeling

[SleepyPanda]

Good morning @Zoe7

I'm okay thanks, a bit busy this Sunday morning, great to see lots of members this morning. I hope you have a great day.

SP

[Zoe7]

It is a shitty thing feeling as you do at the moment @MDT You have had a lot going on lately and it is probably all catching up with you - not an easy position to be in buddy 

Hey @SleepyPanda At least busy will make the shift go quicker lol Hope you have a great day also.

[MDT]

True that @Zoe7
I also seemed to awake really early today... Tired atm though

[soul]

@MDT - it’s hard not to compare yourself to others especially when you have this warped opinion of yourself and feel worthless. Social media has a lot to answer for. Just about everything that is posted is people having the time of their lives. But bad stuff does happen and it happens to good people. 

Just know that this feeling will pass. In fact everything passes. Nothing stays bad for ever and nothing remains good either. There are ebbs and flows. Use that incredible intellect of yours to realise that what you are feeling right now is the product of your depression and that there are many positives in your life even if you don’t see them or appreciate them right now. 

You will feel joy, there will be fulfillment. Try to listen to some of that great music that you have posted on this Forum and know that there are people who care about you. 

[soul]

Sometimes it’s best to avoid the stuff that triggers you. I used to hate walking home through the Main Street on my way home from yoga on a Friday night as I’d see so many people having fun. I thought that would never be me again. 

When it seemed all too much, I chose to walk a different way and that helped.

[MDT]

Thanks @soul
Social media has conditioned us I think. Even after not using it as much as I used to I still think it focuses too heavily on the outside. In other words, it is even easier to hide what is inside.
I think the truly beautiful is when the person inside reflects onto the outside person. That's what it is to be human - not a puppet.
I have made progress in the dating area and I learned about myself so that was positive.
I'm just exhausted from stress and anxiety I think.
Gonna take a nap