Lived Experience Forum

[Eden1919]

Hello, I recently got out of the hospital and I am having trouble remembering a lot of things from before like the few weeks and the first week of being in hospital are very blurry and i can only remember very general things like that i was very scared everyone was trying to hurt me and i know there was a lot more but i just cant remember it and i mean maybe that is best but i am worried about things i may have said and done to people like embarrassing things like my psychologist told me i kept talking about a prophet or prophecies and i have no memory of this she also said i was very angry at her but i have no memory of this either. what if i went around telling people weird stuff i am hoping i didnt because i do remember trying to hide a lot but i really dont know. has anyone else ever had this sort of thing happen to them? 

[Gwynn]

I find it difficult to remember a lot of things about my psychotic episode. I've heard from a friend who had a post-natal psychosis that that's not uncommon - she figured it was her brain's way of trying to protect her.

[AussieRecharger]

Hi @Eden1919 

In a traumatic experience, the centre of the brain that operates to build memories shuts down and takes on the job of keeping you pumped full of energy to take on threats.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-tcKYx24aA

Try to remember smells and feelings rather than people and events.

[JungleGiants]

Hi @Eden1919 its been a few years for me since my hospital admission with psychosis but I remember most of that time now. 

My brain did feel foggy for about 3-4 weeks, like things werent real. I agree with @Gwynn and @AussieRecharger that its the brain trying to protect you from the memories; I will definately be watching that video. 

[Sleepy_Catcoon]

Hi @Eden1919 I'm new to these forums I hope you don't mind me butting in here 🙂 I'm sorry to hear you were in hospital and can't remember what happened- stuff that you did or what happened to you. It sounds like it would be very distressing 😞 I don't think I've ever had an experience like that so I can't even imagine... Although at times when I can't remember stuff I find it a little unnerving and scary- which I imagine would only be a fraction of what you're feeling 😞 I can appreciate the feeling of embarrassment but I don't think you should be embarrassed because it sounds like stuff was really intense for you at the time? Maybe the others are right and your brain is trying to block out what happened? Or maybe it could be a side effect of any medication they put you on? I'm not too sure, have you talked to your supports about this?

[Eden1919]

Thanks everyone, I hope it is just my brain trying to protect me but maybe the memory will come back after a little while. either way hopefully things start to go a little more smoothly. I have mentioned this to my supports they said it was fairly normal. 

[Sleepy_Catcoon]

Hey @Eden1919 I hope you're able to remember what happened and that it's not too distressing 😞 I'm glad your supports were reassuring 🙂

[Eden1919]

@Sleepy_Catcoon  Thanks I just have to hope I didn’t do anything embarrassing in the meantime. 

[AussieRecharger]

Hey @Eden1919 

Just wanted to check in and see how you were doing now?

[Eden1919]

Hi @AussieRecharger  I am going mostly ok I have been quite busy this last week I still dont remember a lot of what happened but some things have come back.