Lived Experience Forum

[Tammy73]

I don't know what to do, i'm so depressed, i've been feeling depressed for so long but these last few days I can't leave my bed, I can't take care of myself or anyone else, I want to lock myself away and never come out, I want to dissappear, I want to go to sleep and not wake up. It's too scary out there, if I go out something might tip me over the edge and I'm scared what i might do. what do I do? 

[tyme]

Hey there @Tammy73 ,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing. It sounds like you have been depressed for a long time now. I'm hearing how hard it is to get up from bed, let alone leave your room.

Have you spoken to a doctor about how you are feeling? It sounds like the depression has been lingering and possibly even getting worse?

I remember back to when I stayed under the bed covers for years. I didn't get out of my bed or room. I tried so many different anti depressants, but nothing made much of a difference until FINALLY, I got the correct med. Once things started improving a little, I was able to get out of bed and attend therapy. Then as I improved with therapy and skills, the medication dropped. Although I'm still on a dosage, it's very low. I can stop it, but it needs a lot of time to get off it.

Things can improve @Tammy73 . Just hang in there. 

[Tammy73]

i'm seeing a psych but can't get in until thursdy, i spoke to a random doc on the phone today and they didn't help really except to want to prescripe me meds. I chatted with beyond blue yesterday and lifeline today. 

I don't know if I should call triage. I feel like I want to check myself in somewhere for a while. somewhere that my kids and family don't see me and I don't feel a burden to everyone. 

[tyme]

Hey @Tammy73 ,

Good on you for being able to do that! That's an achievement in itself!

Consider each thing you do an achievement - no matter how great or small.

If you feel up to it, you can also visit Daily Achievements! 

You deserve all the support you can get.

We are here for you 🙂

[LiamD]

Sometimes going and staying in bed is helpful. 

[NatureLover]

Welcome, @Tammy73 , I'm sad to hear about your severe depression 😢

Like @tyme  said, I also spent 3 years in bed with severe depression and SI (suicidal ideation). I was on an anti-depressant but it wasn't strong enough, it turned out. Then I started seeing a psychiatrist who immediately swopped me to a stronger anti-depressant, which saved my life. I also started therapy with her. 

I've since been in therapy for the past 15 years and am still on that stronger anti-depressant. My life feels much different now and much more positive. So I want to encourage you that things can get better. Hold in there... 

A handy forum tip is if you tag someone by typing @ and then clicking on their name in the drop-down box, that person will get a notification and won't miss your reply.

[Oaktree]

Hi @Tammy73 

I once spent 2 years in bed. In the end I fronted up at the hospital and told them I wasn’t functional and needed to change my meds as an inpatient . That worked thankfully. It has taken me many years to get on the right meds. Finally when i had a massive manic episode in December 2020 they put me on my current meds and I have been well ever since. I am lucky that my current meds are working so well! Long may it continue. 
Good luck

Meggle