I'm sorry

[Change123]

@BlueBay

If you want to get out you will, you can do this - if I can make changes and survive what we just went through with out having a total melt down you can do. One thing I noticed that only just started through this experience of mine is "pain" I always try to distract myself as I dont want it anymore either and just like you want to go and hide etc.  For the first time and I dont know how I done this but I was really upset about this sister ordeal and in pain for my partner.  Instead of trying to push it away I think I actually done what they say to do and that is "let the pain come on and accept it" I did that and I cried for another few minutes but then I felt like it was gone quite quickly and I was no longer hurting.  So what I mean is sometimes when we push it away and keep pushing the pain away it still comes back until we let it come over us and we accept it.  The funny thing is when I let it wash over me it wasnt as painful as when I try to push it away. Hope that makes sense?

I too get very sensative but one thing I'm trying to do is - right down my feeling towards something that has me all over sensative and say to myself "how would I respond to my partner or best friend if they got all over sensative over the same thing" usually the answer is you are much kinder to them then you are on yourself.

Dont apologise for posting, you are just as important as others on here - thats what the forum is for.

@BlueBay maybe a suggestion that has helped my state of mind is try not to say anything negative or down.  Not that we dont want to hear it its just when you say it you cement it in your brain more and it becomes more fact than fiction. You are a wonderful person who is going through a lot at the moment and in need of support. After all you are my long lost twin

I'm giving you a big hug, please be nice to yourself - we all care about you.

[BlueBay]

Thank you @Change123 for hugs and support 

Oh yeah, long lost twin!!!!  LOL 

[Decadian]

It seems as if I have two younger twin sisters - @BlueBay and @Change123

How lucky am I - and I have this other sister - TS - and yes - it gets to me at times

I had a cry yesterday - I am often asked why TS does what she does - I don't know - she's worse that having root canal work - and I hurt too

You girls mean so much to me - I wish both of you the best of all - knowing darn well I have walked waist deep through stuff worse than mud at times years ago - and it can still hurt and still make me cry and I have this horrible feeling TS will cause me grief until my end-date - and if her end-date is before mine I will still wonder

Lots of hugs girls

Dec

[BlueBay]

Awe @Decadian I'm so glad we connected. And @Change123 it seems like we know each other so well. All one big family. 🤗 hugs to both of you xxxooo

[pip]

Hi guys. Sorry about my ranting earlier. guess I hoped that somehow ranting would help, it has. I've sort of decided to let the $$$$ go from the other forum. I can't change what happened. I came back with the intention of 'being there' for those who needed me and all I've done is moan about 'woe is me'. I appreciate the warm welcome I received, so I will now focus on you and how I can be helpful. Love you all and hope I'm still welcome.

[pip]

Hi @BlueBay. Anything I can do help you I will. Your problems are ours. We all need each other for support and care. Being sensitive and caring means you have a heart of gold and that's 'ace' as my son frequently says. Don't go away, lean on us, a problem shared. We love you and we care.

[Appleblossom]

@BlueBay

Many people interpret general comments as something they need to thiink about personally.  I did it all the time.  It was very scary when I was younger and I would get myself quite upset and tied up in knots. Now I can see that it is a natural human response .. dont magnify it as being about a problem that you caused.

I applied to do MH nursing when I was 20 but was rejected as they said I would personalise everything .. they were probably right!

I have counteracted those experiences from my childhood and adolescence by being very vocal (through my fingers) now.  It was empowering for me to express my views and opinions .. but that is it all it is .. then i became worried that others would internalise my comments without me ev en knowing who was reading and relating to them.  i try and be careful .. but even then .. it still can happen .. all we can do is raise it .. and try and understand and get along with each other. 

 .. your gardening and walking the dog stories lift my mood .. take care Bella

[Former-Member]

what a lovely warm response, am touched xx

[Former-Member]

oh good grief, technology! the above quick reply was in response to your comments Pip.

[pip]

Hi @Former-Member. Thanks for the kindness you've shown. I'm in a better frame of mind now. Have made up my mind that what's in the past, stays there. Even painful memories of childhood trauma I can safely lock up in a box and only take them out, if I decide to. Right now others need me more than I need bad memories.