Lived Experience Forum

[MessyMind]

Hi there, 

in late may/early june i decided to make positive change in terms of actually trying to eat/drink & generally look after myself better. 

i felt like i was doing OK but for some reason ever since i got my first period back in 4 months, my anxiety has been through the ceiling?! more than my usual high anxiety levels anyway..

i feel REALLY defeated as my anxiety and in turn struggles with disordered eating have been a battle for me ever since i can remember (I'm currently 27). 

i also have underlying auto-immune issues & this cold weather has my body in more pain than usual. it's also worse than last year. just 1 example is that my fingers are swollen & painful..

i have 0 energy & just really feel like I'm slipping majorly over the past week or so, mentally & emotionally that is. although i never feel 'good' anyway, so don't really have anything to compare this too..

i have posted here once before & do apologize if i never got back to you! i find it super hard to concentrate but this doesn't mean that i do not see or appreciate your support because i absolutely do!

i also get overwhelmed SO easily, so posting is definitely hard for me but i felt like it was important to write out what's currently going on for me.

if you feel the same in any way, you're not alone. thank you for your time,

~ MessyMind

[tyme]

Hey there @MessyMind ,

Good to see you back!

I have been thinking about you actually. 

I can see you have made the effort to make some improvements, however, you are find yourself struggling with anxiety and reverting back to disordered eating?

Do you have a professional you can work with to help you with some strategies that could reduce some of this anxiety?

At the same time, have you been able to speak to your GP about what's been happening for you?

I hear how the cold affects you too. For some people, they get seasonal depression because of the weather conditions. 

I'm hearing you and want you to know you are not alone in this.

[Snowie]

Hi @MessyMind 

I'm sorry to hear you are going through all of this.

Well done on getting your thoughts out. You have shown a lot of courage in doing so.

Please know we are here for you

Snowie xoxo

[MessyMind]

Hi @tyme, 

i have been thinking about you too, what a coincidence! 🙂 

yes, that is correct. as my anxiety has further esculated, it's making keeping consistent with my food intake and overall progress VERY hard to keep going. i have indeed slipped back a little recently, which has been super disheartening for me.

yes, i do. i had a professional talk me through strategies to use around meal times. they've been ineffective lately, as i also have some added things going on around me. when i worry about those around me, these techniques don't even have a chance at working! 

i have not been to my GP super recently but am considering going in for a blood test. it took years for my auto-immune issues to show up but as I've continued to be so symptomatic, i feel like follow up tests would definitely show it again. i found my GP unhelpful when i first got abnormal results, which is kind of putting me off going back + I'm just too tired but i know i should address this further! 

yes, i first heard of seasonal depression at a support group in 2016. i feel like this is something i do struggle with. there's just a few too many layers of struggle going on for me lately. 

i always tell others to be gentle with themselves but I'm definitely not doing well at this towards myself right now in life. something to work on! 

thank you Tyme, 

it's good to chat with you again! 🙂 

[MessyMind]

Hi @Snowie,

thank you for your kindness and support. 🙂 

i always struggle to open up but i found myself thinking of this forum again, which i think is a good thing! 

it's good to be back around on here again, 

~ MessyMind 

xoxo

[Snowie]

@MessyMind it is good that you are around again.

We are here to support you any time that you need it.

I hope you have a good day today.

[tyme]

Hey @MessyMind ,

How are things?