Lived Experience Forum

[Zoe7]

@utopia

It is the upcoming anniversary of my Pop's death which I was reminded of by the anniversary of a death for someone else. It has brought back alot of memories and grief.

Combining that with some other stuff in 'the real world' - I haven't known what to do or where to go. It really felt like I was on my own and really alone again. I haven't coped with any of it at all well.

[utopia]

@Zoe7. I'm so sorry all of this happened to you this past week.
Concerning being deleted or comments made by someone. I'll tell you to ignore them. I know it will be 1 of 2 people. As Community Guides - we have raised this with niknik. That is there stuff not yours. Doesn't make it not hurt though.
I have no idea who or what oosts you are talking about with regards to - the death of a pregnancy or very violent detail and stories. But that's not on.
We really want people to post a msg saying 'triggering' or something similar when discussing sensitive subject matter. But some topics just can't be discussed on this forum.
They are far too triggering for most people here. And when you are going through a tough time like yourself - they can be nightmares.
I'm so sorry all of these things triggered such fears in you.
It's not right. How are you feeling now? Still feeling triggered?

[utopia]

@Zoe7 - can the mods make this a private post for us two so we can say what we want with no one else reading it?
@Former-Member is that possible?

[utopia]

@Zoe7. I'm sorry about your pops death. What was he like?

[Former-Member]

Hi @Zoe7

I have been trying to be very careful, as i get thrings brought back very hard by reading something on here unexpected.. i think maybe some of the same things that have caused you extra grief. I dont know what the ansewr is other than lots of self care, taking breaks, staying to parts of the forums that are safer or your own thread for a bit if needed.. Its ok to do all of that. I think as the forums have gotten bigger its been harder for the mods to be as consistent. But I think its important that we keep letting mods know via the report button or emailing when explicit details are being described.. 

hope you are ok,

lj

[Zoe7]

@utopia Last post edited!!

I'm still really shattered by it all and it has made it really hard to be on here - and this was my 'safe and supportive' place - where do you go....?

[Zoe7]

@Former-Member I really didn't want to bring anyone else into this - especially you as I know you saw that post too. I am sorry I wasn't quick enough editting the last post.

[utopia]

@Zoe7 - please don't say it or you are okay when your not. Especially with the mods. I can't edit my posts. So what I write stays unless a mod helps out.
The mods are aware of certain people and their posts and then them removing them. It's been watched. Some people have been warned. The forum has barred people from our site before and they can do it again.
This needs to be a safe place. So good on you for letting them know.
You may want to talk to @luna or @NikNik about a particular person not being able to access your safe thread or for them to be able to tag you. Not sure but maybe they can do that.
Have they been writing that on your thread?

[Former-Member]

It's ok @Zoe7, everyone is different too, and what might upset one person would not another, because we've all had different experiences. But that's also why the community guidelines were written to ensure this stays a safe place. I hope that your feelings of safety will grow here again, This type of thing has only really been an issue int he last month or so, as the forums have grown so much! But i do think it will settle again. Its kind of like the forums have teething issues as things change with its size. But there will be ways to keep managing this.

Are you managing to feel ok using yuor thread? 

[Former-Member]

@utopia - no i dont think there are ways of making people's areas only available to some people. But as you say, people who don't or are unable to follow the guidelines are reminded with support, but if unable to follow the guidelines the mods have ways and means of dealing with that too, which thankfully we don't have to worry about!

lj