Lived Experience Forum

[Flower88]

Having anxiety is making the thought of being alone on Christmas hard 😞 all my family is busy and I don't have money to fly to mums. I'm only 27 have hardly no friends and Christmas Day will be my birthday. I hate having anxiety I wish I could just not care and brush this off!

[Flower88]

Sorry just needed to rant as I kept saying to mum it's fine it's no big deal. But I feel so alone.

[Former-Member]

hugs, i have huge anxiety over christmas as well. I'm not sure where my kids will be, whether with me for part or none... and have no family so its a lonely time anyway and always feel like i have to be everything for my kdis. but the prospect of not having them even is getting me more down. 

I'm sure there will be people on here 🙂 Someone suggested that maybe i volunteer at a soup kitchen or something buti dont think i could. what about you? 

sorry that this is worrying you too!

lj

[Flower88]

Well I hope your kids will be with u. Yeah it's a pretty challenging time. I was thinking of doing that. It just sux when your own family are too busy for u. But I don't blame them they have their own family. And I'm only a cousin.

[Former-Member]

aww I can see how that would make you feel maybe a bit rejected or left out? not great for the self esteem! but as you say, perhaps its just an oversight or all those different pushes/pulls that people seem to have from all their family at xmas time. I hear all the time all these stories about arguments about where christmas will be, with whose side of the family will they spend which time etc.... maybe we're lucky lol?

i dont know.. but at same time it does feel pretty crud!

lj

[Flower88]

Yeah lol I'll buy myself a big pressie this Christmas haha. At least I can watch Christmas movies undisturbed.

[Former-Member]

As a kid I loved Xmas,loved the Christmas carols on xmas Eve on television.I don't get on with family and have spent Xmas alone as long as I can remember.This year I'm in town so every gossiping neighbour will know I'm on my own .On the farm ,I used to do gardening etc.As mentioned on this site, I have battled with major depression and anxiety,the past year which honestly I didnt think I would still be here,most times I wish I wasn't.I hate Xmas,I dread it,not having a job and having continued trauma it's a time to reflect on your life,the past and present,and the future I wonder if you have because I am such a failure.If you can spend time with family  well do it.I have been invited to people in the past but quite frankly ,prefer to be on my own because these people are intimidating,and due to my state I hate making conversation or being in the position to answer questions about myself.This is a part of my anxiety,and I haven't the energy for it.If anyone suggest me going to family,forget it,too much tension and I have lived a life avoiding it due to the trauma.

[Flower88]

Hi @Former-Member I'm so sorry that is reallly hard for u. Sometimes being on your own is easier. Anxiety and depression can really set us back. being around people that can make life hard is not worth it I think your self worth is more. I'm going to watch some Xmas movies, maybe that might be a good idea? 🙂

[Former-Member]

Thanks Flower88,the only movie I like is the Jack Frost movie ,on every Xmas.Yes this one will be a hard one for me as this year has been my darkest.I am worried especially due to this.

[TAB]

look outwards maybe? @Former-Member ..family isn't everything ..especially when it's not re me .. last year I drove 3000ks return for Christmas only to find sister has her own dates re Xmas etc ie went the week before ..some people just aren't worth it no matter how alone you might feel