Topic Tuesday // How to support yourself while supporting others // Tues 18 June, 7pm AEST

[Shaz51]

@Former-Member  I always seems to be running on empty . how can i helpmyself @greenspace 

[eheadspace]

Hi @Former-Member , thanks so much for sharing those thoughts and feelings, it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share your experience.  You sound like a super supportive friend and supporting people who are suicidal is really tough and traumatic. I am so glad you contacted a helpline afterwards to debrief, as that’s super importan and forms an important part of self care! 

Sounds like you have good insight about where you are at in terms of your own wellbeing and in terms of asking yourself whether it’s time to put in some boundaries in place with friends. It might be a good idea to do this whilst you regain your energy levels. I think we are going to talk more about self care later on in the chat so you might like to note some of the ideas to see if they might be manageable in your life.

[greenspace]

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@Shaz51 wrote:

Hello @eheadspace , @Former-Member 

@BlueBay, @Adge , @greenspace 

i help others before helping myself x

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Hi @Shaz51 

I can understand the impulse to help others first, but that can be really draining, don't you find? 

The airline safety message always says to put your own oxygen mask on first, which I think is a great idea. 

Although in life it's not always as clear a choice as that...

[Kylie2]

Bed making* darn auto correct

[Former-Member]

Racing start indeed! Welcome @eth  🙂 Always lovely to have you.

[Shaz51]

I can understand the impulse to help others first, but that can be really draining, don't you find?--- yes it is very draining @Former-Member , @greenspace , @eheadspace  but onward i go @

[Former-Member]

Alright crew massively energetic start! Thanks so much for the thoughts all and of course our wonderful guest Julia from @eheadspace  your insight is incredibly valuable.

Discussion point 2....

What are the first signs that we might be experiencing our own “Compassion Fatigue” whilst helping a mate/loved one who are leaning on us for support?

[Froggyhawk]

Hi I'm new here, I have no idea what I'm doing but hi.  I am mum to a 22yo with temporal lobe epilepsy and a pending schizophrenia or bipolar diagnosis, also a 17yo with depression, my middle son is currenlty OK, and my hubby also has depression and is not enjoying his work.  That's me so you can guess why I'm here.

[Kylie2]

Maybe we can brainstorm simple choice making ideas for self care? What choices did you make today? Also maybe we can brain storm ways of saying no but providing alternatives...

[eheadspace]

Whilst everyones experience will be slightly different some common signs that we are becoming fatigued in the helping process can include feeling exhausted and low on energy which may impact our ability to attend to our own self care needs, we may be feeling unable to complete our own daily commitments like work or study. We may start feeling less compassionate towards our mate/loved one and may even wish they would just get over it, we may become resentful of our mate or loved one.