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Butterfly96
Casual Contributor

New here and not coping well

Hi,  I just got

told about this site and I thought I would give this a shot.  I have tried everything else and nothing has helped so far 

I  am a 22 year old female that suffers with chronic depression as well as high functioning Autism.  

Lately I have been feeling really lonely due to sone of my so called friends always ditching me and making excuses not to to see me.  They only ever want me and my family when they want something, therefore making me feel used and worthless. Due to my Autism I find it hard making friends, and the fact that all my friends are busy and haven't got time to see me a lot upsets me because I am not that busy myself. I wish I had their life of being busy and have multiple friends to go and see in their spare time.  I don't have that in my life at all  therefore it makes me lonely. 

This so called friend has been using me for years,  even to the point where they chose my ex over me for ages. She also has a habit of telling him all my business because it makes him better to hear how low I am in life.  

Everytime she hurts me I just get real low and suicidal, and for the last few years it has gotten to the point where I have had multiple suicide attempts and self harm episodes where I have ended up in hospital because she has hurt me so bad. 

It has gotten so bad where my mum and u are arguing all the time and I can't stand seeing my mum so upset. 

This week has been my breaking point. I got so sick of being lonely that I hurt myself twice this week,  once last Wednesday and today when my mum was away for a little bit.  Honestly if I had anything sharper I would have killed myself. 

I am also very bored at home with nothing to do,  so I over think a lot.  

I'm over friends hurting me and I just want to be happy at home on my own,  but my autism won't allow me to let things go.

Has anyone who has experienced this got any tips on how to let things go so they don't consume me and make me suicidal? I also would like some tips on how to keep me occupied at home and how to do everyday things while being so depressed.  

If you have any ideas that would be great! 

Thank you so much!  

13 REPLIES 13

Re: New here and not coping well

hi @Butterfly96 and welcome

Im 22 also and have my own friendship/family troubles so can relate abit as well. im sorry to hear your hurting yourself, i have that unhealthy coping mechanism too but it can be managed with help.

Do you think you would be able to speak to your gp? they can refer you to other health services like a psychologist who can help with everything thats happening for you. if you cant physically speak about whats happening as in maybe its to hard to find the words or your to nervous, writing it down on a piece of paper and handing it to your gp could work too.


Do you think joining in with a social group or interest group would be helpful in making some new friends and help with the lonliness?

Re: New here and not coping well

also feel free to have a look around and join in where you feel most comfortable and to tag members you just put an @ symbol at the start of their name just as ive done for yours

Re: New here and not coping well

@outlander Thank you so much for the advice.

 

I am currently seeking treatment by my GP and he is monitoring my mental health. I was under a psychologist but she refused to listen to me so I am in the process of finding another psychologist who specialises in autism so I am hoping that works.  

I also wrote in words a letter to my psychiatrist and he did not take that into consideration at all.  I've literally tried everything so I'm just waiting until I can access that special psychologist who can hopefully help with my autistic symptoms. 

I have joined a group for girls with autism but some of the girls don't seem interested in hanging outside of the group all that much when I want to. But I guess it's a matter of getting to know of them properly too I guess.  

However thank you once again for the advice,  I appreciate it!

Re: New here and not coping well

i really hope that youll be able to see a new psychologist and psychiatrist soon @Butterfly96

@Appleblossom please forgive me but i think ive read your on the spectrum? sorry if im wrong though!

im glad youve joined a group but sorry they are seeming to reciprocate those feelings. do you have any interests or hobbies that you could have a look at clubs like sports, book clubs, science groups, arts or crafts groups?

Re: New here and not coping well

Coping strategies

coping box

 

 

these 2 threads here may be of some help 

 

 

@Sans911 @CheerBear may be able to offer some other advice..

Re: New here and not coping well

@outlander yeah I'm hoping that is all organised soon when my NDIS plan goes through. 

Thank you so much for all those links,  I shall have a look! 

Re: New here and not coping well

i hope they help @Butterfly96
im not through NDIS so im not much help there im afraid but im pretty sure theres an NDIS thread which you can find by using the sane search bar with info and chats about it, i dont think they would mind you joining in if you had some questions or some experiences to share there too

Re: New here and not coping well

Thanks,  I shall check that out too.  My NDIS plan is designed for stuff like that so my manager has found a really good psychologist that deals with autism,  so hopefully it helps 😊 

Re: New here and not coping well

Thats good to hear @Butterfly96 glad to hear youve got a good gp and manager helping you in the meantime till you can get some more supports
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