Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @dands26 .... 👋

[Determined]

Hi @dands26 how are you this morning,

Things are steady here arm. 

[Zorro]

Hi 

To be brutally honest if he is just a boyfriend, it is probably better off for you to part ways and get on with life and find new people. 

Sorry

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Zorro and welcome to the forums ....,.

That is always one choice you can make, but the heart doesn’t always follow the logic of the mind ...... which is probably a good thing. It can bring a lot of heartache to love people with mi issues, but it can be just as rewarding too, to help them on the road to recovery, or at least management of their condition. It’s a very difficult and personal choice ...... one that it is important to feel supported in.

I know there are many people who have asked why I haven’t left my husband, with all the trauma our circumstances have brought about, but it is nowhere near that simple. As it turns out for us, the condition my husband is suffering from is inherent in the personality type of our kids as well. We all have to learn to manage this as a family, whether we choose to stay together in the long term or not.

I hope you soon feel comfortable here ..... it’s a wonderful community of people.

[Determined]

I second everything @Faith-and-Hope says above.

[dands26]

Hi @Zorro
If you are here because you support someone with mi you would understand that their condition doesnt make them who they are.
If they had lost a limb and didnt have mi would you be saying better to part ways and get on with life.
They deserve love and they deserve support.
If it was just part ways and move on then nobody would stay and support them. How is that fair?

[Determined]

I agree with everything @Faith-and-Hope and @dands26 have said above.
I would go further and for me (and no diarespect to anyone who has felt the need to walk away because it is tough) but for me it is also about commitment and how invested you are in a relationship.
Walking away from my darling has never been an option even before children arrived. It would have been much easier in many reapects but it has never been an option.

[dands26]

@Determined i completely agree.
I knew that he wasnt 100% when we started dating. I still entered the relationship anyway. I gell in love with him anyway.
Just because there have been some major triggers and his mi has spiralled out of control doesnt make me want to just part ways and get on with it.
Im sure like all of us have the slightest moment at any point when we are at the verge of careers burn out where u think it would be soo much easier to leave.
But i never would.
I love him.

[Sanatorium23]

Hi,
Thanks for checking in. I’ve been away; took my mum on a little trip which we both needed. He managed ok without me and the new meds are helping the side effects. Mental health wise he’s the best he’s been in a long time, but as I’ve mentioned in another thread, there are other issues to now deal with involving substance abuse that has escalated. Won’t go into it all again, but wanted to thank you for checking in.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Sanatorium23 .... 👋

Caught up with you on the other thread ....