Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[BMe17]

Hi, 

For the last 20 years, I have lived with having a mother diagnosed with late-onset schizophrenia. Unlike typical schizophrenia, my mother only started having episodes of psychotic behaviour when she was in her 40's. Ever since then, my siblings and I have lived with her mental state. At first when she got sick, she would experience psychotic episodes with hospitalisation then periods of being well and back to normal. For the last 10 years, she has been, you could say unwell but that state has been stable. 10 years ago in one of her well periods, she was discharged from the local community health centre. Ever since then, she had no care or support from any services however she still has delusions etc. It is not known whether she still takes her medication as she won't divulge that information. 

My mother doesn't look after herself properly, she lives by herself in a unit with severe mould and hoarding issues, she rarely goes out, she has a poor diet, looks much older than her 65 years, and she won't seek medical attention when necessary which is what has led me to post here as I'm struggling a bit. We had a bit of a situation where on my mother's weekly outing, she had a fall. According to her, she felt a sharp pain in her ankle then fell to the ground. I asked if anyone helped her or if someone offered to take to her to the dr. I know someone helped her but I don't know much else except she still managed to go shopping afterwards and got a cab home, and actually paid the cab driver to bring up her bags. I didn't know that this happened until the next day as she "didn't want to disturb me". I had tried to call her that night with no answer which always concerns me when that happens. I managed to get onto her last night and she told me. She said she couldn't answer the phone as she couldn't walk and that she didn't want me to come around as she couldn't walk but she said she was fine and didn't need to see a dr. 

This morning I phoned the Mental Health Line to get some advice. They said she needed to get medical help and I should go around and encourage her to go with me to see a GP and if not to call an ambulance. I really did not want to do that as it would have traumaticised her so much after previous events so i decided to go around to her place and take her some groceries and gauge how she was and try and get her to go to the dr with me. When i got there she took a while to answer the door. I walked in and walked past her. I turned and saw her holding on to furniture and using a stick to walk. She continued to cruise the furniture to walk. At first i just said i have bought you some food and put that away for her then after seeing how she was walking I asked her to come to the dr with me and that i was concerned. She outright refused and told me to leave and basically Threw me out. I really did not want to call an ambulance and thought I would go to the police station as maybe they had some advice. Bad move that was as they were not much help. Basically they said, even if i called an ambulance if she said she was fine and didn't want to be checked out, there was nothing that could be done. At one point of the conversation, the officer said "if her foot is really injured" in a way that felt like he was questioning my observation. Anyway I left the station and went home, i thought i might call the Mental health line again just to let them know what happened and try and get some other advice that wasn't so traumatic. Well this person was so rude and asked me what i wanted and why i hadn't called an ambulance and she questioned whether mum had had a fall and was psychotic. This phone conversation made me feel a bit worthless as a Carer. It seems that they don't take you seriously unless something drastic happens. All i wanted was some advice with an outcome that would be less traumatic for all involved. 

So now, after speaking with my siblings, we are now going to wait as she is no immediate danger and is fine other than her foot and see how she is in a few days. 

Any advice would be much appreciated. 

[Lilaca]

Hi @BMe17 ,

Just a suggestion, why don't you call a local mobile podiatrist to visit your mom? Ask for their opinion, they might be better to judge the situation.

[greenpea]

@BMe17  Hi BMe17 and welcome yes basically nothing will be done until she is a danger to herself or others .... that is the way it goes these days..... Take good care of yourself.greenpeax

[BMe17]

Yes, it seems like nothing has changed. 

[BMe17]

Thanks, podiatry is a bit different to the issue though.